Jasam…The True Story

Chapter Six

“Sam, are you in there?” Jason screams. Desperate to find Sam and Danny, Jason’s pounds, shaking the door frame.

Looking from the door to Drew and Scout, Sam wants to scream for Jason. She wants her screams to sail through the door, igniting The Stone Cold in him. She wants him to break the door and save her. She wants him to end the five-year nightmare they all have been living. She wants him.

Seeing Scout in Drew’s arms, Sam is reminded of what she is doing and why she must do it.

“Get rid of him.” Knocking Sam back to reality, Drew walks towards the kitchen. “Or I will.” Thinking he had more time, Drew didn’t anticipate Jason getting out of jail so soon. He thought he would have more time to work on Sam. He thought he would have more time to formulate his new plan.

Soothing Scout, Drew watches from a distance.

Fixing herself, Sam walks towards the door. Looking back, making sure the area is clear, Sam leans her head against the door; taking a moment to ground herself, she prepares herself for the lie.

Slowly opening the door, Sam is greeted by a panicked Jason, a state she never witnessed before.

“Oh my god, I was so scared.” Pulling Sam into a hug, relief rains over Jason’s mind and heart.

Jason’s happiness is quickly crushed by Sam’s’ coldness. Feeling the weight of Sam’s stiff body, Jason releases her, searching her eyes for answers.

Cut off from everything happening around her, Sam stands stiff as a board. 

Avoiding eye contact with Jason, everything in Sam breaks. “Why did you come here?”  Turning away from him, Sam tries to hide her true feelings. She has never been able to lie to Jason’s face, now is no different. Fighting every cell in her body telling her to go to Jason, Sam shuts herself off. She has to break his heart in order to save it. She could live this lie if it meant Jason would be safe and alive.

“Sam, what’s wrong? Why did you leave the hospital? Why weren’t you answering your phone?” Grabbing Sam’s arm, Jason spins her around. “Sam, just tell me. Whatever it is we can work it out together.” Feeling the disconnect in her, Jason drops her hand.

Staring into her, Jason begs for answers.

Sam doesn’t respond. She folds her arms around herself and rocks trying to get the feeling back into her body.  She can’t muster the energy lie, but she can’t tell him the truth either. What she wants to say the fear in her heart won’t let her and what she has to say her mind can’t comprehend. Having a fierce internal battle, Sam stares at the ground; confidence she’ll break if she looks into Jason’s eyes.

Reaching out but stopping himself, Jason feels the shift in Sam’s heart. He feels the change and pierce of its beats. Balling his fist, placing it at his side, Jason steps back, fully taking Sam.

Reaching out, Jason touches the invisible wall created between them.

“Sam, look at me.” Unsure of his feeling, Jason request Sam eyes. Holding Jason past, present, and future; Sam’s are the only truths Jason needs. Her eyes are all he wants.

Hesitating, Sam struggles. She yearns for Jason. She wants to be this close to him, but she knows she’ll reveal everything with one touch. “Sometimes you have to do what’s hard.” Feeling like she’s betraying something scared between them, Sam cries.

“Sam?”  Jason whisper.

Slowly raising her eyes to meet Jason’s, Sam stops breathing at the sight of his baby blues. It still stops her heart to see Jason in person. To see his face, feel his presence; feel his love, its all still surreal to her.

“You shouldn’t be here!” Sam cries. She hates what she has to do, but her choice is made. She has to hurt him in order to save him.

“Sam, what do you mean? It’s me. I love you, I’m here now. And everything is going to be okay. I promise.” Seeing the struggle brewing inside Sam breaks Jason’s heart. He can see her need for him, and feel the fear in her. Unsure of how to proceed, Jason extends his hand.

Holding on to herself harder, “How do I know what your saying is the truth? Why should I believe you are the real,” dropping her head. “The real Jason?” Sam cries.

Sam’s questions bury Jason in confusion and rock him to his core. He can fathom where her resistance is coming from. Wondering if all of it was a lie, Jason drops his hand.

“Was it all a dream?” Tears fall from Jason’s eyes. “Meeting Danny.  Finding out the truth, kissing you, hearing you call me, Jason, your I love you. Was it all just a dream?” Turning for the door, Jason opens it.

“Wait.”

Standing frozen, Jason cries. Nothing has felt right since waking up in the clinic. He thought if he made it home, everything would be made right. He was devastated to find the opposite upon his return, to feel like an outsider amongst the ones he loved the most.

“I just want you and Danny. I just wanted to come home. If you two aren’t home, I don’t know what I should do. What should I do?” Jason turns to face Sam.

Sam’s declaration of his identity, made Jason feel whole again. It was like a hard wave hitting the shores of Hawaii, the way her love beat him at that moment. Sam’s declaration gave Jason confidence he hasn’t felt since their wedding. He doesn’t know what his world will become if she takes it all away.

Standing frozen in time, Jason awaits Sam’s response. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t breathe, he waits. He waits for her to tell him it wasn’t a dream, she believes him, she loves him; the one true Jason.

Unable to resist, Jason looks deep into her for the answers; he searches for her voice in all the silence. He seeks the fire in her soul. “What do you want me to do, Sam?”

Silence, Jason pleading eyes are deafening to her. She can’t hear herself think with his eyes piercing through her. The silence between them is daring to Sam.  She can’t hide her truths much longer. Feeling exposed and vulnerable the deeper Jason looks into her, Sam covers herself. Wrapping her arms around herself, closing herself off, Sam knows the longer Jason looks, the more he will understand.

Screaming in her head to look away, Sam wants to speak, she wants to tell him another lie, but she can’t. Jason’s inquisitive eyes leave her paralyzed. She can’t move, she can’t speak, she can’t think. Stuck in the in-between with Jason; him reading her soul, her not wanting him to stop until he knows it all. Sam wants him to see the truth, she wants him to call her bluff, and make her tell him the truth. She wants Jason to break through the lies and see she desperately needs him. She wants him to see the ashes of her Phoenix desperately trying to be reborn.

“I love you, Sam.”

Jason’s words enter the atmosphere, making Sam weak. She begins to stumble as each word enters her soul; penetrate her like daggers exposing everything she is trying to hide.

Sam’s knees give way, falling into Jason.

Scooping her into his arms while never breaking eye contact. Jason doesn’t need his eyes to know Sam needed him, her soul told him. He didn’t need his eyes to tell him Sam was crumbling. He could hear the cries of her soul. He could feel the battle she was fighting, he just didn’t know how to help her.

Jason always trusted his connection with Sam, but after five years, after her questions, and after her coldness; Jason is unsure of what he should believe. Her heart and soul are telling him to save her, but her questions about his identity give him pause.

Jason doesn’t trust himself enough to know exactly what Sam needs, her doubt causes uncontrollable doubt in Jason. Trying to fight through the doubt they both feel, Jason works to listen to Sam’s soul but “Why should I believe you are the real Jason?” echoes in his head.  

He hasn’t felt this connected but disconnected from Sam since she was pregnant with Danny.

Doing what comes naturally to him, Jason pulls Sam in closer. Connecting as Phoenix and Dragon.

In no rush to vacate Jason’s loving embrace, Sam feels calm, she feels peace, she feels the battle within soothing.

Starting in Sam, and ending in Jason, chills run through their bodies. Their hearts begin to beat the same tune, Jason starts to feel peace, and for just a second, he allows himself to relax. Giving in to the embrace, he wraps Sam in every bit of love he has, allows himself to fall into her. Breathing her in, Jason loses himself.

Her questions enter his mind, clouding the moment causing Jason to pull away, he doesn’t want to let go, he wants to pull her in even closer, but he doesn’t know if that’s what she wants. He doesn’t know anything, other than she is hurting, other than she needs him.

Steading Sam to her feet, Jason tries to let go but he can’t. He allows his hand to linger on her forearm, caressing her soft skin; warming her goosebumps.

Removing one finger at a time, Jason slowly moves his hand from her arm, before his thumb has a chance to leave her body she grabs it;  wrapping her hand around his thumb

“Say it again,” Sam whispers.

“I love you, Samantha Morgan.”

Jason’s words float in the air between them acting like a sledgehammer breaking down the wall Sam created. Sam doesn’t want the wall to crumble, but she doesn’t know how to stop. This I love you came from Jason’s soul. Sam could tell Jason had been holding that back, she could tell he was unsure of the route he should take with her. She could tell that this I love you was Jason’s last hope. She could tell it was Jason’s everything. She couldn’t ignore that. She couldn’t ignore Jason’s love, not when it was wrapping her in an armor she hasn’t worn in 5 years. His love was breaking down every defense she had. Sam knew fighting Jason’s love would be the hardest fight of her life. She knew it would be an impossible fight, but everything she loved was at stake.

Unwrapping her hand from around Jason’s thumb with the intent to break their connection, Sam intertwines her fingers into his. She knows she needs to let go, but she can’t; she doesn’t know how she never did. Jumping down the Jason rabbit hole, Sam can’t see the end. She didn’t want to see the end, she wanted to keep falling, to keep loving.

Floating in silence, intertwined by mind, body, and soul. Sam is exposed and vulnerable, and in this vulnerability, she is ready to let Jason in. She is ready for her Dragon to protect her, she is prepared to expose Drew and all his secrets. As Sam finds the courage to speak; Jason finds the courage to do what his heart has been aching to do since Sam opened the door.  Leaning in, Sam follows Jason lead. She could feel what his heart wanted because her heart was aching for the same thing. Taking their time, slowly inching towards each other, Sam grabs Jason’s face with urgency in her soul. Slightly caresses his face, pulling him closer, Sam lightly brushes her lips against Jason’s, sucking his essence in.

No longer able to resist each other, Jason and Sam crave each other. Cupping the back of Sam’s neck, Jason pulls her into him like his life depends on it, taking one last look into her eyes, Jason moves in for the kiss. Barely connecting, Scout cries from the back.

Scout’s cries knock Jason and Sam out; her cries ground Sam to her reality, causing the wall back up. Breaking all connection with Jason, Sam lets him go and takes a step back.

“Was that a baby?” Jason knows he heard someone cry. He’s confident it was a baby but unsure of how Danny cries. He knows that was a baby’s cry and not Danny. Finally taking in his surroundings, Jason notices the baby toys on the table, the playpen in the corner, and the stroller by the terrace doors.

 

Escaping the fact Sam had a whole life in the five years he was missing, Jason never thought that life could include more children. He never thought she could do that to him. The gravity of this sends Jason’s mind spiraling. Searching Sam’s soul for answers, Jason notices her walls are back up. Starting to understand Sam’s coldness, Jason knows why she questioned him, he sees her life went on without him.

“Yes, my daughter with…” Sam looks back towards the kitchen. “With Jason.”

Unashamed of her daughter, Sam loves Scout with everything in her; she just doesn’t love the fact she’s not a true Morgan. Sam always wanted a family with Jason. Since becoming pregnant with Danny, Sam has dreamed of their family being completed with a baby girl. She thought when Scout was born she was the luckiest person in the world to get everything she ever dreamed of. She felt her world was whole and complete with the arrival of their baby girl. Scout was supposed to be their dream child, she was supposed to be their long-awaited baby girl, the baby girl they wanted since the beginning, the baby girl that made them possible. She was supposed to be a Morgan and the fact that she isn’t is a thought Sam can’t bear.

The weight of this knowledge is too much for Sam. She didn’t want to utter the words. She didn’t want Jason to deal with a reality she couldn’t bear.

“What’s her name?” Shaking his fist at his side, Jason tries to hide his pain.

“Her name is Emily Scout Morgan.” Sam stutters.

A wave of emotions hit Jason, “My sister’s name?” Reminded of Sam’s dream of their family, Jason remembers Emily was always supposed to be their daughter’s name. Lost at the revelation of Sam’s daughter, Jason is happy for Sam. He’s happy that Sam finally got everything she ever wanted. He’s happy that she has the daughter that has eluded her since the beginning of their relationship. He’s happy for her but devastated for them.

Like Sam, the weight of the Scout knowledge is too much to bear. Jason doesn’t want to show the pain he is experiencing, but the gravity of it is too enormous for him to hide.

Noticing the shift in Jason, Sam moves in to comfort him; before she can fulfill this action, Scout’s continued cries, stop her.

Scout’s whimpering seizes Sam at the moment. Standing frozen, torn between her daughter and Jason, Sam wants to reach out to Jason; she wants to make it better for him, but she can’t. Her fear is, that if she lets him back in, she’ll never let him go again.

Feeling Sam’s hesitation, Jason makes it easy for her; stepping back into the hall, Jason buries everything deep inside himself. “It’s okay. It’s all going to be okay.”

Overwhelmed at the magnitude of Jason’s love, Sam’s eyes swell with tears. Sam can’t imagine how she went 5 years without its touch, how she survived so long without being able to bath in its richness.

Breaking her soul to do what she feels she must, Sam breaks herself to reject everything she wants, but Jason’s love and reassurance make it easier. His love gives her the courage to do the impossible.

Nodding to Jason, Sam mouths “Thank You.” Shutting the door in his face, Sam lets out an earth-shattering wail. Her wail blast through the door knocking Jason off balance. Palming the door with both hands to steady himself, Jason slowly lowers his head to rest on the door. He lingers for a while, willing his love through the door and into Sam.

Shutting herself off from Jason’s love crushes Sam to the ground. Hugging the front door, Sam slides down the door until her body hits the floor. Going limp, she wails her lungs at the emptiness she feels; she wails at the coldness that enters her heart; she wails until no sound comes out. Sam stares at nothing, lost in her thoughts; lost in her thoughts of Jason, she doesn’t notice that Drew has re-entered the room and place Scout in the playpen.

Moving slowly towards a comatose Sam, “Hey! Babe are you okay?” Drew worries. Worried Jason’s return has caused a setback, Drew moves close to Sam but doesn’t touch her.

Avoiding startling her, Drew waves his hand in her face trying to get Sam’s attention. He whispers her name. He leans in extremely close, moving his hand towards her face; before he can make contact, Sam jumps up, screaming at him.

“Don’t you ever touch me.” Sam brushes past Drew, heading straight for the playpen. She grabs Scout and heads for the stair. She doesn’t want to be around Drew, and since she can’t be with Jason, she just wants to be alone with her children.

“Don’t you forget I’m still your husband and the father of your kids. And you’re going to make sure everyone believes that, right?” Drew’s arrogance pulls Sam back to him, halting her movements before she can disappear into the upstairs.

Knowing Sam is breaking herself in two by pushing Jason away, Drew tries everything he can to force her into a setback. He believes Sam’s mental break will give him the advantage he needs to beat Jason. He thinks once the dust settles and Jason is gone for good, Sam will go back to being happy with him. He feels he needs to be the necessary evil to lead them back into his version of happiness, with time, Drew truly believes he can make Sam love him. He truly believes he can beat the power of Jason and Sam’s love.

Feeling the rage swirling within her, Sam turns around and makes her way back down the stairs. She can feel everything she wants to say. The words pound in her bones, every inch of her is ready to snap, every inch of her is furious with a rage she hasn’t felt since hating Alexis for baby Lila and her brother Danny.

Reaching the bottom step, Sam stops herself. She shakes her head from side to side, turning herself away from Drew, she begins the journey back up the stair. Realizing Drew wasn’t worth any of her energy, Sam reserves all her energy for her Jason’s love.

 

———————————————————–

Ripping his heart out, Jason pulls himself from the PentHouse door. He didn’t want to leave especially after hearing the wail that came from Sam, he didn’t want to go after being in his home with his wife. Jason wanted to stay and continue searching her for the answers. He wanted to stay and be the family they both had dreamed of.

Unsure of how he found the strength to walk away, Jason’s soul leads him to the only place that could soothe. He doesn’t remember leaving the PentHouse. He doesn’t even remember driving out of the city.  All he remembers is the wail Sam gave off when she closed the door, a wail that echoes in his ears, feels his soul with despair; a wail that drove him to the footbridge. Jason doesn’t know why his sub-conscious brought him to the footbridge, but he is blessed to have ended up there,  blessed that his beloved footbridge still stands, blessed to have a place to go to when life gets too much.

Moving slowly towards the footbridge, captivated by the views of Port Charles like he has never seen it before, Jason takes it all in. He allows the views to wash over his senses, and for a second the wailing that lines his ears, stop.

Cleansing his soul of negative thoughts, Jason clears his mind of Sam’s pain. The harder he tries to push it all away, the harder it pounds him into the ground. There on the footbridge, Jason succumbs to his emotions. Allowing himself to deal with everything he has been holding back, Jason breaks down. He replays the last 48 hours in his head, he feels Sam’s despair surround him. Trying to focus on Sam’s love and Danny’s smile, Jason feels hopeless; her despair is too powerful for him to concentrate on anything else.

Sam’s despair pounds Jason into the ground, his entire being goes weak; grabbing the railing as his body smashed to the ground, Jason stays there letting the tears flow, allowing his emotions to consume him.  

Crunch.

Jumping up, Jason whips out his gun.

“Who is there?” Jason demands, hoping it was Sam. Searching the woods for a sign of her, Jason gets his hopes up.

“Sam?”

“Robin.” Jason gasped, tears welling in his eyes,  he can’t believe she is here. He wants to run to her,  to embrace her and tell her everything he tried to say to her the night died. He wants to tell her Thank You for his life, for his second chance but the doubt in her eyes, the questions in her brow,  stop him. Jason stuffs his hands in his pockets, waiting for Robin to tell him he’s the lie.

“Oh my god, Sonny said it was you.” Walking towards Jason, her jaw drops at the sight of him. Robin knew she would be able to find Jason on the footbridge. Knowing he sought refuges from the turmoils of life on this bridge, Robin tries to imagine the kind of chaos Jason is experiencing. She knew he would be trying to find the light in all the darkness.

“He said you had your old face.” Robin exaggerated, blinking a couple of times before tears swell her eyes. Enchanted by the presence of Jason, Robin thought she would never see this face again. She thought she would never see those blue eyes looking back at her. “I thought he was you.” Dropping her bag, Robin runs to Jason. She believed wholeheartedly Drew was Jason.

“Oh my god, it’s you. It’s really you, Jason. I can’t believe it’s you. That you’re really here.” Entering Jason’s arms, Robin cries her eyes out on his shoulder.

“I can’t believe it’s you. This is the icing on the cake that I truly needed right now.” Holding her as tight as he can without crushing her, Jason words tickles her ears; transporting them both to a place neither thought they’d venture to again.

Going back to that night in Montego,  Robin relives the night they shared their first kiss. Inhaling him in, Robin is hit with a wave of emotions as she remembers everything they’ve ever shared together. She remembers the love, the friendship, the trust. She recognizes Jason Morgan for who he truly is.

“You being here, is better than the best” Jason laughs, releasing Robin from his grip. He steps back, marveling at her being alive. It broke Jason to think he was the cause of Robin’s death. “I never wanted you to sacrifice yourself for me.”

Jason would never want someone he loves to suffer because of him.

“Oh stop it, my life wasn’t sacrificed, it was stolen so I could save you. How is this possible? Who is that other man pretending to be you?” Running different possibilities in her head, Robin thinks back to everything the other man has done since stepping down in Port Charles. She thinks about all the bad he did as Jake Doe, all the good he did as Jason Morgan.  “I don’t understand how something like this could happen. Why would someone want to steal your life? Why replace you?”

“I don’t know yet, but I’m going to find out. I have to, he has Sam and Danny.” Jason states, balling up his fist, looking out at into city.  He tries to suppress the rage gaining momentum within him.

“What do you mean he has Sam and Danny?” Robin inquires. She doesn’t understand what Jason could mean by such a statement. Robin couldn’t fathom Jason hanging out on the footbridge if Sam and Danny were in trouble.

“She believes him. Something is wrong, and she isn’t ready to tell me yet. I can feel it.” Jason’s hands shake with rage. “Something is not right, I just don’t know how bad it is yet. Something is telling me to trust Sam. I’m just going to trust Sam.” Jason professes, trying to convince himself more than Robin. He keeps telling himself that Sam is okay, that she knows what she is doing.

Reaching out to Jason, Robins purse rings, stopping her. She turns for her bag. “It Emma, I have to take this. We’ll catch up again soon.” Robin declares, walking towards the road.

Stopping, Robin turns, taking one last look at Jason; an infectious smile blankets her face; a childlike glee fills her heart, she gives a slight wave before disappearing into the darkness.

Deciding to shut his brain off and just enjoy the view, Jason stares out at Port Charles.

POW POW POW

This Post Has 9 Comments

  1. Poor Sam and Jason!!!

    Still having a hard time seeing Drew as a villain. It just doesn’t fit with everything he’s been up to this point, and the twist feels too sudden for me.

    Their “almost” kiss was heartbreaking.

    1. To be honest, I’m having a hard time writing Drew as a bad guy! I honestly don’t even want to write for him!!! There has been a few times I’ve wanted to go back a rewrite a chapter or two…. but I’m trying to believe in the process and keep allowing the story to come to me

      1. Well, I’m sure your muses have written him that way for a reason, and since it’s your story, no one knows what it needs better than you!

        I tried writing a fanfic of my own, but to call it a struggle would be an understatement. I had/have no idea what I’m doing (I’ve written before but never fanfic or GH) So whatever happens moving forward, I commend your effort!

      2. It is hard… I know what you mean! Writing for already established characters seems like it would be easy but you have no creative control… it makes it a challenge but I can definitely say I’m growing as a writer because of it!

  2. I love the update!!! I feel sorry for both Jason and Sam. I want To be Drew dead already. Jason really needs Sam. I’m not happy with Sam at all hurting Jason that way. She better fix this. I’m praying that Jason gets hurt so she can be there for him. I’m hoping we will be able to read the trauma Jason has gone through. I hope Sam will have to pull Jaso back from the edge and give him a reason to fight.

    I really love your story but I really can’t stand Drew. Please post more Soon !!!!

  3. Keep it up. ❤️ It

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Close Menu
×
×

Cart